Transformational Medicine and Tactics with Dr. Dan Engle MD | AMP #182
Psychiatrist, psychonaut, and neurocognitive specialist Dr. Dan Engle MD has entered a new phase of his work as a bridge between Medicine’s past and future--unpacking his vision of ‘transformational medicine’. We discuss the value of hunting, effective dosing, pain management, the benefits of CBD, why psychedelics are taking the lead in treating the epidemic of hopelessness, and how holistic approaches to treatment are changing the way we look at what is possible, individually and collectively.
Hi Aubrey. I felt compelled to reach out after listening to episode 182: Your conversation with Dr. Dan Engle (I only finished listening minutes ago). This is only the second time I’ve listened to your podcast and you may not even believe what a shift you’ve just made in my life. I should preface at least a bit:
A year ago, I experimented with psychedelics “for fun”. At the time, I didn’t realize I was taking a “heroic dose” of psilocybin. During that trip, I’ll never forget teleporting to torture cells throughout the world, and feeling all of the pain there was to feel, after which I watched myself slowly whither away and die. Then, my consciousness was born into a beautiful universe that I simply observed with great delight. I forgot that I had a body and a name, but I was blissful.
I haven’t bee the same ever since, and I’ve spent the entire past year researching what happened to me — ego death, now one of my favorite topics. I’ve also experimented with lower doses of psilocybin, LSD, and MDMA a handful of times since. I’ve seen what benefits each has had for dealing with my PTSD and expanding my awareness.
The first psilocybin trip I took after that first “heroic dose” trip, I didn’t take quite as much. And the lesson from that trip didn’t reach me until today, as I was listening to episode 182 of your podcast, stone cold sober. During the trip (which occurred in March of 2018), I had perfectly designed my “setting”. I was in nature with two people I trusted and loved. I was sitting under a secluded tree canopy, steps away from a giant lake, a hammock nearby. As the trip began to build, I started to feel like my shoulder was dislocated. This feeling was so apparent that I could no longer make use of my right arm. I kept asking my friends to check it out: Was it partially dislocated or fully dislocated? Should I go to the doctor or just try to push it in myself? They kept ensuring me there was no dislocation. I managed to enjoy my trip regardless, but I couldn’t make use of my arm, not even when entirely necessary (as if using the bathroom while tripping isn’t hard enough).
Today, as I was listening to this episode, it became extremely clear. During minute 56, you and Dr. Dan discuss somatic awareness (something I’ve studied and evangelized about!). I immediately burst into tears during an otherwise non-emotional day. I paused the episode and sent the following text to my boyfriend — the only person in my life that I knew would completely understand:
“I finally, just now, realized that my body was screaming at me to deal with the issues attached to [my shoulder]. And, I just time traveled to the first time my shoulder separated before I gained my big injury, the full dislocation (at age 14). I had completely forgotten about it, but now I remember it like it was yesterday. My parents had divorced and I was angry at my dad about not letting me see my mom. I wanted to run into the woods where I knew I belonged. I ran from him, and he grabbed my arm. Grabbed it so hard in mid-sprint and spun me around to face the house. My shoulder separated and was never the same. A few years later, it fully dislocated during a silly move. I just now realized I’ve been holding a grudge against him ever since. Our relationship has never been the same. I just synced up with him and had a little cry session. It was one of the most therapeutic things I’ve ever done. There is much more work to be done. But, I feel so relieved to finally understand the source of underlying pain I’ve lived with since I was 9 years old.”
This is only the beginning for me. That part of my PSTD was so minor compared to everything else that I buried it all the way below the more major traumas. I’m peeling myself like an onion and I can’t believe I’ve finally reached these depths. I’m so grateful. I wanted you to know how impactful you’ve already been in my life. So grateful. Thank you.